Hurt Feelings

It's been a while since I last posted. Sometimes it's because nothing exciting is happening. Other times I'm spending my days pondering all the many happenings of life. Yeah, not so much. But occasionally I do ponder. I'm afraid I might go all philosophical today. I'll try not to be too wordy though.

I've been reading a great book, Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl by Lysa TerKeurst. Recently my group Bible study started back up, so I had to put aside Lysa's book. I decided to take it to the doctor's office with me yesterday to read while I waited. When I saw the title of the chapter, I was a little shocked: When God Hurts My Feelings. Wow. Did I read that correctly? Is that OK to say? After reading the chapter, I think it is. She pointed out that we need to be honest with God about what we're feeling. I mean, He already knows, right? When I'm honest and let Him know He hurt my feelings, then He can work to change my perspective and my heart. She went on to say that sometimes we ask God the wrong questions. It's OK to ask why something happened or didn't happen, but only if that question draws us closer to Him and doesn't push us away. And even if He told us the why, we probably wouldn't get it. The better question, however, is, "What am I supposed to do now that this happened (or didn't happen)?"

As I read all of this, I realized that God had recently hurt my feelings. I guess I didn't know it was OK to admit this, or tell Him this. But I sat there in the doctor's office and told Him that He had, in fact, hurt my feelings. I didn't know why He chose the outcome of a certain situation, and really, it doesn't matter. He's God, and I'm not. His ways and His thoughts are not mine. They're so much better. And even though I know it may take a little more time before I fully get over what happened, I am OK with it. I asked God what I needed to do now, and I partially know. So now I just have to keep trusting that He'll show me what else I need to know or do.

In the big scheme of things, the way God hurt my feelings is so small. Really, I may not even remember next month. What I do hope to remember down the road is the lesson. Be honest with Him. Let Him show me what He needs to show me. And gain a stronger, closer relationship with Him.